my love is turning 5

Alhamdulillah...

MasyaAllah Tabarakallah

dear Allah

dear Allah, I wanna thank sooooooo much to You

I wanna thank to You for making me alive until now
even if I feel dying because of alergy for almost everything I ate,
still I wanna thank to You

I wanna thank to You for keeping my son alive
even if I often gave him imunomodulator, routine medicine and etc to boost his immune,
still I wanna thank to You for making him still with me until now :(

I wanna thank to You for keeping my parents alive

and let me live with them until now

even if there are so many dramas, up and down, happy and mad

I can't say I don't love them

I love them
I really love them
they are grow older

but still I never had the ability to make them happy :(

recently,

I wanna thank to You for making me as a positif covid-19 patient for 24 hours
in that very short time, You showed me much
You showed me how hard my parents efforts to look after my son while I'm not around
seems like You want to show me what will exactly happened if I'm away :(

I feel so guilty

it's hard for them

they are old but they're keep trying to do their best
I shouldn't ask for more :(

dear Allah
I'm sorry for all my mistakes
please let my parents healthy and happy
please let my son healthy and happy
please let me healthy and happy

dear Allah, I love You
I do
I really do
please forgive all of my sins
I am full of sins :( :( :(

my love~